How To Play

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Go Wish gives you an easy, even entertaining way to talk about what is most important to you. The cards help you find words to talk about what is important if you were to be living a life that may be shortened by serious illness. Playing the game with your relatives or best friends can help you learn how you can best comfort your loved ones when they need you most. Go Wish can be played by one, two or more people.

Each deck has 36 cards. Thirty-five of the cards describe things that people often say are important when they are very sick or dying. The cards describe how people want to be treated, who they want near them, and what matters to them. One card is a "wild card." You can use this card to stand for something you want that isn't on any of the other cards.

 

Ways to Play

Go Wish Solitare

This is a good way to figure out what is important to you and why.

1. Read through all 36 cards. Sort them into three piles:
  • Very important to me
  • Somewhat important to me
  • Not important to me

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NOTE: Putting a card in the "Not important to me" pile does not necessarily mean that you don't care about what is written on the card. It could simply mean that this is something that you have already taken care of. For example, if all of your financial affairs are competely in order, taking care of your financial affairs is no longer one of your top ten concerns. 

2. You can use the wild card to stand for something you want that is not on any of the other cards. For example: "To live in my own home." or "To be able to recognize my family and friends." That card can go into any of the three piles.

3. When you have three piles, sort through your "very important" pile. Choose the 10 wishes that mean the most to you. If you don't have 10 cards in your "very important" pile, choose some from your "somewhat important" pile. If you have more than 10 in your "very important" pile, sort through them and put some of the cards into the "somewhat important" or "not important" piles until you only have 10 cards in your "very important" pile.

4. Rank your 10 "very important" cards, putting the most important ones at the top of the pile. This is your Top 10. 

5. Think about how you would explain to your family or friends why those things are your Top 10 wishes. Think about your "not important" pile and how you would explain to your family or friends why those things are not important to you. Then make time to talk to them about your choices. 

 

Make time to talk to your loved ones about your choices.

 

Playing Solitaire On-Line

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Playing the solitaire version on-line is exactly like playing with the actual cards. We've added sound so that you can hear the contents of each card. By default the sound is turned on. If you'd like to turn the sound off, mute (turn off) your speakers. 

As you view (and hear) each card from the main pile, you can click to put each card in the "Very Important," "Somewhat Important," or "Not Important" stacks below. Move your mouse over any card in any stack and you can view it again and move it to another stack or back to the main pile. 

When you have completed your sorting, you can save your stacks by clicking "save." You'll be asked to pick a file name for your stack (no spaces allowed). Pick something you'll remember! Plus, you'll be able to email the name of your sorted stacks to yourself or others.

Think about how you would explain to your family or friends why those things are your Top 10 wishes. Think about your "not important" pile and how you would explain to your family or friends why those things are not important to you. Then make time to talk to them about your choices. 

Your stacks will remain here at Go Wish for years to come so that you can revisit them to remind yourself of your saved wishes. Plus, you can resort them and save them as a different name as time moves on and your desires change. There is NO personal information stored with these stacks so your privacy remains intact! Share your file name only with those you wish to know about your wishes. 

 

Go Wish Pairs

This can be a good game to play with someone who might become your health care agent. It is especially important for that person to understand your wishes. It is best to play with two decks of cards. 

If you are playing with the actual printed cards, you will need two decks. If you are playing on-line, each of you should play on your own computer connected to the Internet. You don't have to be in the same room or even the same time-zone to play on-line!

1. Each play reads through all 36 cards. Each play divides them into three piles. 

Player A sorts the cards into three piles:

  • Very important to me
  • Somewhat important to me
  • Not important to me

Player B sorts the cards into three piles:

  • Very important to Player A
  • Somewhat important to Player A
  • Not important to Player A

If you are playing on-line, save your stacks and email/tell the other player the file name he or she should open. 

Both players compare the cards they have in each pile. Talk about the differences in how you ranked some values. Be sure to explain your choices. It is important for Player B to understand Player A's wishes.

Both players also may choose their own Top 10 from the "most important" pile of cards. Again, talk about why those are the most important.

Go Wish was developed by Coda Alliance, made possible in part by a grant from the Archstone Foundation. For more information about Coda Alliance, a community-based, not-for-profit organization helping individuals and their families plan and prepare for end-of-life issues, go to http://www.codaalliance.org